Tuesday, September 28, 2010

When Life Calls For You To Step Aside.....

There are times in life where it is our place to defend ourselves - whether that be verbally or physically. Obviously if someone is coming against our life then it's time to take action and defend yourself. But there is also a time and place for other people in a place of authority above is to take care of the situation. But I don't believe people can take you seriously if you have taken matters into your own hands before......there are times when life calls for you to humble yourself, step aside and allow someone else to handle the situation. That doesn't make you weak, or stupid. It makes you mature to know when it's your place and when it's not.
I recently read a mother's account of a situation her daughter is in with "friends" from school. She said the friends are being immature and bratty over boys. Which I am sure can be the case, I have dealt with situations like this myself. Your friend likes someone, that someone likes you instead and then it's a fight. But luckily even though I had issues with friends at the time I had friends who were at least decent and kind enough to not make a HUGE deal out of it. I guess that was the benefit and blessing of growing up with friends who had been raised in church. This mother of course sees her daughter in a "no wrong" light. Which is easy for any mother to do, we all want to think the best of our child and hope that they would never stoop so low and some of their friends. But I know that as a young teenager you sometimes do things behind your parents backs to push other people's buttons, I know I did! But then when they retaliate you look like the victim. The war between these girls is over guys, of course! I'm betting that not one of these guys is that great, that mature or worth the time a day any of them are being given but so be it! Lol! The mother goes on to state that one of her daughters so called "friends" came by at school and kicked her. First of all, that made me laugh outloud! That teenagers are so immature that they resort to kicking each other like 2 year olds when they get mad?! I don't think my 3 year old has ever lost her temper enough to kick anyone or hit out of anger ever! Hopefully Beej and I have taught her better then that. But then this mother states that she told her daughter that next time it happens she is to hit or kick the girl back!!!! Can you believe that?! I'm sorry, I guess I was taught manners far more then that. I was taught when something like that happens you go to who ever is in authority there and talk to them and you take someone with you who witnessed the event if that's possible. Someone else commented something to the same extent on this person's blog and was basically told that it's "giving in" like that that puts women in abusive marriages.....that if a man attacked her she would fight to the death. And I agree, if you are fighting for your life defend away! If a man hits or kicks you, first try to get out of the situation and fast, but if not and it continues then of course defend yourself! We aren't talking about her child being abused by a man at school, we are talking about teenagers! But here is the key to getting authority to back you and do something for you - because the mother's biggest complaint is that the school authorities aren't stepping in the way she would like to handle this situation. The biggest key is that you are the kind of person who is credible. I'm sorry, if you've been a trouble maker yourself then most likely people are going to think you were as much apart of it as before. If you been in fights, verbal or physical then most likely people are going to simple think you started it or continued it. So the best policy is to step aside and allow someone who can handle the situation in a mature fashion take over. I had told G over and over, if someone hits, bites, pinches or slaps her when she is playing she is to immediately go to someone and tell them. That's that, if the behavior is continued and no one takes action then we need to remove them from the situation until it can be handled properly.

"If you wish to experience peace, provide peace for another." - Tenzin Gyatso

"Peace is not the absence of conflict, but the ability to cope with it." - unknown

1 comment:

  1. Hey, I just wanted to say thanks for the post about gallbladder removal! I really appreciate it. My daughter is 3 1/2 too, and man, she has had such a streak going lately, being the mother of a 3 year old is exhausting, but fun. Anyway, thanks! I love reading your blog!