Friday, August 21, 2009
To Raise Up A Child....
I am still learning as a parent what works and what doesn't work. I have watched my parents raise 5 children, all with different techniques and I've tried to glean the best from them. I've watched others around me and how they deal with their children. What they use as punishment or what they do to try and prevent having to punish at all. I have an excellent child, don't get me wrong, she's a two year old. She's still learning, and we are still teaching every day. She still gets into things she shouldn't, she still acts up when she doesn't get her way, etc. I am not one to immediately resort to spanking. I correct her first and see if she does it again. Most of the time, I don't have to tell her again. Remind her later sometimes, yes. But she usually moves on right away. But at the same time I'm not against spanking. Sometimes Gianna does things that just need a good swat on the butt or a pop on the hand to remind her that I've told her over and over not to do something. I don't do it in anger nor do I do it to be mean. I do it because I love her and I expect a certain amount of obedience out of her at the time being. I get so tired of people complaining about things their children do as though they have NO control over it at all. They complain about the horrible fits their children have in the store, or how they kick and hit when put in their car seats, or say filthy things and call them names. There is no call for that and it should never be tolerated. Period. You have to teach your child. I know so many people are against spanking but I say, look at the results! Gianna never pitches a fit when we go to the store, she'll cry when she wants something but we gently remind her that behavior like that is not allowed, if she keeps it's up the results is a trip to the bathroom. And she's usually done! I never have to fight to get her in her carseat or fight her to get dressed. She does have issues with sharing but we are actively working on that one! Believe you me, I am much more relaxed about things then I was raised. I tend to let Gianna have her way alot. I don't like to tell her no but I do for her own good sometimes. I am teaching my child that not everything goes her way all the time. That she has to learn to control her actions so that their are horrible consequences to follow. Yes, everything has a consequence if you do it but what if we taught our child not to do it in the first place? Wow. We might actually keep some horrible things from happening in life. Yes, if you steal you get punished but how about we just don't steal in the first place? Or if we get mad and start a fight someone is going to get hurt. How about we just teach our child to control their anger and emotions in the first place so that no one has to get hurt?
Just my thoughts for today! I have a great couple of mothers around me. We don't always agree on how to handle our children or how to correct them. But I do think we learn from each other! I get new ideas almost daily! Things I want to do and things I don't want to do. I want Gianna to be able to think for herself, choose the right path and live her life to the fullest! I want to guide her through new things and new ideas. I don't ever want to keep my child from trying things or going where she will. But I always want the line to be open for her to ask me anything or talk to me about everything! I only have to do this once and I want to do it right!!!