Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Am I admired for who I am?!

(Crystal- My dearest and bestest friend! My first best friend and hopefully my best friend til the end!!! I love her dearly and admire her zest for life and her happiness in who she is and where she is going! A wonderful mother and talented photographer! She inspires me!!!)
(April - a fellow young mother and I admire her so much! Talented and full of life! A great mother and such a supportive wife! Not to mention beautiful too!)
(Erica- a true inspiration for me! Super fit and such a happy person! She makes me smile!)
(Cristina - isn't she beautiful?! And that adorable little boy of hers too! She's the picture of healthy and fit! And I just love that!)

Don't you just love it when people assume that everything you say is about them?!!! This happens to me a lot it seems. I guess a lot of what I say applies to a lot of people so they all take it personally. But I've also learned that most of the people who take everything I say personally are usually a little of their rockers anyway! So I don't let it worry me. I've long ago realized that the majority of the people you try to befriend or at least be nice to will at some point turn on you or just lose it themselves. I'm trying not to really care any more. Realizing that at some point other people will replace them. I do tend to get attached to people emotionally though and it can be hard for me to let them go even when they treat me like crap. But I'm smart enough to not be involved with them I still have a hard time letting go completely. Someone I used to be acquainted with recently read my blog and assumed that everything I was saying was directed at her! Even though at the time it wasn't I see now that it did apply to her too! Lol! But since this person doesn't care on little bit for me I didn't take her pouting about it very seriously. I've long ago realized that she is simply insecure and well, to be honest, jealous of me. I guess we are all jealous of someone we know but some of us handle it a lot better then other do. Some people let it fester inside them until they are so angry they can't stand you, other people just let it hold them back and they keep quiet about it but it makes them even more insecure, or still others rejoice in others strengths and do their best to reach their full potential as well. For instance, I'm a little jealous of my dear friend, Crystal. But instead of hating her for all her accomplishments I rejoice with her! I'm happy she's made it to where she has and that she is so perfectly happy where she is! She is very much in love with her husband and they have a delightful baby boy together whom they practically worship!!! And she's got a wonderful photography business - she's talented at what she does and she finds fulfillment in it. You can check her out on Facebook under b.L.c Photography. She does incredible work and I would so recommend her to you! It makes me wanna push myself harder to find what my true love and calling is in life and to be happy and fulfilled in it! I guess I try to turn what could potentially be jealousy into admiration for that person instead. I also "admire" my fellow blogger and friend, April. She is beautiful and artsy. She's also smart and very talented when it comes to graphic designing. She's also raising two children and supporting her husband as he pursues his musical career. I think their family is adorable and I admire them a lot. I'm also very much inspired my "friends" Erica and Cristina. Even though we've never met I love them both and admire them greatly. They both are fitness fanatics and I so want to be like that one day! I'm so far from it. But hearing about them working out every day despite having full schedules and 3 & 4 children each I am inspire that I too can keep up a work out routine with only one child! They are both gorgeous and have the kind of bodies every woman would like to have! I wanna be like them when I grow up! Lol! I tell them that all the time!
So in the end - I want to be happy, successful, artsy, and fit! I want to be a wonderful mother and an incredible wife! I want to be able to be those things with out ever having to worry about what others think....I want to push aside all the negative crap that has been shoved my way and just be who I am! I want to find my "calling" and love in life. I want someone else to look at me and "admire" me for who I am!!!

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