Wednesday, September 16, 2009


It's been one of those days, one of those days where I just feel pretty discouraged about myself. I got up and my hair looked crappy so it ended up in a crappy looking ponytail. Plus it was raining so my bangs curled up and looked silly and frizzy. I put on my one pair of "cute" jeans, that I've had for years now and are starting to kinda look saggy and worn. And then had to decide between the four shirts I own that fit. Ugh. I haven't had new clothes in years. Seriously. I've bought a new shirt here and there or whatever by my wardrobe is so outdated it's ridiculous. Left my house feeling horrible. So I've been working out like crazy and attempting to watch what I eat (I mess up alot!) and I thought I had lost about 8lbs which I was thrilled with! Got to the dr. and asked them to weigh me since I haven't weighed on a real scale in a while. Lo and behold, it says I weight 10lbs MORE then I thought! I was nearly in tears. How can two different scales weight my daughter exactly the same but then weight me 10lbs difference?!!!! I was SO discouraged. So discouraged. Then I went out to dinner and ate crap. Why in the world do I do that? When I feel crappy about myself I end up eating worse then I do when I feel good. UGH!!!! So anyway, I came home and threw in an extra cardio workout hoping it'll burn off that nasty Mexican dinner I ate. Gag. So now I'm sitting here all sweaty, wondering how in the world I can really stick to my diet and make myself lose weight. I just wanna LOSE WEIGHT!!!!! *SCREAM*!!! Why is this such a hard task? I feel like I'm working harder then I have in years and yet I don't feel like I'm making alot of progress. Anyway, I just needed to vent! I'm sure my perspective will be better tomorrow!!!

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