Apartment living...

Ok, I'll admit I love apartment living. I know, I know, I'm not supposed to but I do. If I could buy an apartment that is totally the route I would go! Oh wait, I think those are called condos. Well, then I want to buy a condo. We are currently living in a house that we are renting. It's big, I mean, not huge but for us it's big. There are five bedrooms. Yup. We hardly touch two of them, one is there in case guests come (like my dad when he visits), it has a bed in it. The other room has the piano in it because it's huge and heavy and that's where it's been since I can remember. Beej uses it to write music sometimes. I have a "craft" room and I use that occasionally. Beej has a room set up for his music and books and that I will admit is very nice. Gianna has a room and then we have the "master". It's a lot of house and it has a massive yard that we have to mow! I am grateful for the house, don't get me wrong. It's been a nice thing for us to have, the rent has been lower then renting an apartment in town. But that's another thing - when we lived in our apartment we were right in town and we could walk "downtown" if we wanted and could get to a grocery store in 3 minutes. Now we are almost 20 minutes from town out in the middle of the country.

I like not having the responsibility of dealing with anything that goes wrong. If it goes wrong here we have to figure out how to fix it. Our "landlords" live in another state and they do what they can when they can but for the most part it's on us. In an apartment someone is there to call if you have an issues. At our first apartment in AL (which these two photos are from) it was very little space but I loved it! I loved that we had a gym (and I so regret not using it more!) and we had a pool and hot tub. And we had an awesome walking trail right next to them. We could rent bikes from our apartment complex to ride on the trail (we did that once and the chain broke on one of the bikes at the farthest end of the trail!).

I like that feeling of community even if you have no clue who your neighbors are. I think our neighbors at the time was a group of men, like 4 or 5 of them. They were foreigners and I'm not sure they spoke much English but they always smiled and seemed nice. I think they were probably working on something related to the Space and Rocket Center. They looked smart. But whatev, I loved that place. And I loved our townhouse once we moved into our own place here in NC. It seemed more house like because it was two stories and brick and we could walk across the street to a school park. And we were 2 minutes from the hospital, if even that. Not that we have to use the hospital a lot but it seemed nice. We had a gas station and a mexican restaurant and a library within walking distance. It's funny the things you kinda take for granted until they are gone.

My husband has taught me that you don't need a lot of stuff. I would gladly get rid of half our stuff right now to live somewhere we really loved. And I know we can't do apartment living forever. We need to invest in our future and purchase something. And I'm not anti purchasing, I guess I'm just anti house purchasing. If we could find a condo in a great town/city I'd be willing to buy asap.

Our family isn't going to get any bigger so we don't have to worry about outgrowing our space or anything. 3 bedrooms would be nice but we could totally do with two rooms and be fine!

I'm pretty sure I'm the only person who actually loves living in an apartment! Lol!

Regret.

Regret:

1. A sense of loss and longing for someone or something gone. 2. A feeling of disappointment or distress about something that one wishes could be different.

“Regret for the things we did can be tempered by time; it is regret for the things we did not do that is inconsolable.” - Sydney Smith

“Accept the pain, cherish the joys, resolve the regrets; then can come the best of benedictions - "If I had my life to live over again, I'd do it all the same”

No one wants to say they have regrets. It sounds ugly. Everyone wants to pretend that they've lived life exactly like they planned and wanted. But the truth is, not matter how big or small, we all have things wish we could change. Some things are minor and we only think of them when things get rough for the moment. Other things are big and they loom over our hearts and minds in cold ghostly shadows. Sometimes we are afraid we've messed up our own lives but I think most of all we worry that we've messed up others. Did the choices we make effect them in a negative way? Are they no longer in reach of their dreams because of what you did or said? Have you altered their lives in ways that can never be changed?

Regret is heavy and it's easier said then done to get over it, to get rid of it, to convince yourself you've made the right choice. To forgive yourself if you didn't. It's true, regret can haunt you if you let it. The biggest question I guess most of us would ask if how do you get rid of it? And how do you make sure you don't create more regrets in the future.

There is obviously a balance between living responsibly and living as though you don't have a care in the world. Somewhere there is a balance between them. Stepping out in faith but not being careless, thinking ahead but not over thinking, enjoying the moment but not burying you head in the sand to the fact that there is a future you have to plan for. How do you make sure you leap at the right time? How do you ensure there will be a net to catch you?

There are no guarantees in life. Sadly there is no promise that if you do something that feels or seems right that it will end up being right in the end. No one wants to do something scary and have it back fire in their face. But at the same time what if you miss out on an opportunity that could better your life, grant you more love, grant someone else love that they might not know other wise.

There are things I regret in life....I do my best to not dwell on them but lately these things seem to be creeping up more and more and I'm wondering honestly how to deal with them. How to resolve them in my heart.

I regret not pushing myself harder when it came to singing and performing when I was younger, when I had the opportunities and the time and the confidence to do it.

I regret not having a wedding when I got married. I spent my whole teen age years dreaming of my wedding and I gave that up in a split second. That big dream of mine. I do not regret getting married, not at all, but I regret that I didn't fight for the wedding I had always wanted.

I regret not taking advantage of my time "alone" my first year of marriage. My husband and I often worked opposite schedules our first year of marriage and I spent many hours at home doing nothing, waiting for him to come home. I wish I had taken pottery classes, taken dance lessons, gone to massage therapy school like I wanted, taken vocal lessons.

I regret not having a second child, a sibling for Gianna. It was overwhelming to have a child at such a young age and I was scared and figured I would never ever want to go through all that again. That I was barely capable of taking care of one much less two. But now that I'm older (and wiser) and I realize I am far more capable of being a mom and loving a child then I thought. I watch my daughter playing alone and I feel bad for her, I always had my sisters ( and brothers) to be with and I love them. We don't always see eye to eye, they drive me nuts but I love them and I can't imagine life without them. Do I want to be pregnant again, not really - it was the worst 9 months of my life but the result - a beautiful amazing child is worth it. Now I wonder if Gianna will regret never getting to experience sibling love and bonding. That she'll never know what it means to be a sister.......

I regret not standing up for myself more over the years with certain people, for letting them walk all over me because I was scared of hurting them. I'd rather be hurt then hurt someone else's feelings.

I regret not being a better friend, maybe if I had I would have more close, dear-to-my-heart friends.

I regret things I've said and done to those I love.....

I love that first quote up at the top of the post - things I did I can't honestly say I regret any of them. Were they the best choice? Maybe not but I still don't dwell on them much. It's the things I didn't do that stay with me. It's the wondering "what if" that can drive you nuts.

What are your regrets? How do you deal with them, how do you let them go?

This will make your night!

I found these pictures of Gianna in my Photobooth on my computer! I guess she had taken them while she was on my computer playing games or something and I didn't know it. I thought they were pretty funny and thought they were even funnier with moustaches!!! We got a good laugh out of it and I thought you might too!

What We've Done

Friday we went up to Lake Lure and spent some time at the park up their while Beej and his buddy played some basketball. It was hot but we had fun and got some exercise in!

We took some pictures in the bathroom just for the fun of it!

We've eaten yummy, low calories snacks like sugar free jello with Cool Whip - 35 calories!

We've played Wonder Woman because we're cool like that!

We've taken naps in uncomfortable places!

We had a new shed built in one day!

We've done lots and lots of walking in these new shoes because I'm obsessed with

my Fit Bit and getting as many steps in as I can!!!

So that's been our weekend so far.....what have you done?

My 25th Birthday....

My 25th birthday was actually really great! I tried not to have any pre-concieved ideas of how it should go and it was fun and relaxing. Yesterday morning I got up and did a few things around the house and got ready and I wore my favorite striped Toms. Then my dad, so thoughtful and sweet, had flowers delivered to me! Seriously, how sweet was that?! Made my morning, it was totally unexpected.

My sis came over and we went and got a quick lunch and did a little "window" shopping. That dress at Old Navy was so cute! And Gianna loves the Old Navy puppy. She cried when we couldn't find him at first but we discovered him hiding in dressing rooms.

After that we went to get a cinnamon roll - there was a Cinnabon stand inside a Schlotzschy's Deli so we got one. OMG. So yummy! Bug and I split one and by the end she didn't even want the last bite that's how rich it was. I also thought the bathroom signs were hilarious! Shapely Bunz for the women and Manly Bunz for the men. How funny!

Beej brought home party hats and balloons mainly for Gianna's sake. She couldn't understand how I could possibly let my birthday "party" pass without hats! So cute! Then we went out to Chili's for dinner. I had originally wanted Mexican but we don't have really good mexican close and we didn't want to drive out of town after Beej got home from work so we went to Chili's and had their chips and salsa which I love and I got fajita's....so, so good.

The Hubs bought me a red velvet cake so we had that after we got home from dinner. It was quite delicious!

Today I got all my gifts! My mom's package to me arrived this morning and I got my homemade peanut butter granola. I admit I've eaten way too much of it today but since I can't have any starting tomorrow I figured I needed to eat what I could! Lol! Here's the strange thing - she ordered my new shoes and a work out bra and shorts online and had it shipped to me. When I opened the package I noticed it looked like it had been opened and re-taped shut. Inside I found my shoes, the bra, the shorts AND a Proactive advertisement and this DeWalt Metal Grinder wheel. Yup. No idea how it got there or why! It was obviously used, kinda chipped and old looking. I'm still trying to figure out why someone would bother opening a package, not take anything out but instead add an old metal grinding wheel! Lol! I sent my mom pics and she's contacting the company but it made for a super interesting package!

So I love my kickin' new shoes - can't wait to work out in them tomorrow. They came with hot pink shoe strings too and I think I may change them out, not sure I like the white ones or not.

Then the hubby came home with my gift from him and Gi - I honestly had no idea what he was getting me especially since yesterday he said, "I hope you like it cause I kinda went out on a limb..." So I'll admit I was a little nervous. He's never gotten me something I didn't like but I wasn't sure.

Then I opened it and HOLY COW, it was my Fit Bit!!! I've been wanting one for quite awhile now ever since some friends of ours told us all about theirs and how much they love them. I really thought it would be helpful with trying to lose the weight I still need to lose. If you aren't familiar with what a Fit Bit is go HERE and read about it. They are amazing and I can't wait to get mine opened up and start figuring it out!

So I got EVERYTHING I asked for and I couldn't be happier! 25 is going to be a good year!

25.

So it's my birthday, people. I'm 25. I'm ok with it. Lol! I think I struggled more with 24 but whatev. I'll do my best to rock 25......

No huge plans for the day. I have to run a few errands because well, like it or not, life doesn't stop just because it's my birthday. I still have to make my bed, feed the cats and Gianna, take some stuff into town, etc. I'm going to go with my sister while she has a procedure done sometime today and then after that, if she's feeling ok, we're going to try and find a Cinnabon and get a giant, oh-so-bad-for-you cinnamon roll! I'm hoping I get a few goodies in the mail from my mom aka my new shoes she ordered. But we'll see, I may not be here when the mail runs later this morning.

After that I think the hubs is going to either take me and Bug out to dinner or make dinner here at the house - not sure, we're planning it by ear since he works till 6 and by the time he gets home and showered it's pretty late.

Gianna woke up and told me Daddy had told her a secret and she couldn't tell me! Then she told me that the secret had to do with A LOT of balloons and then she said the secret was that it's my birthday and I'm not supposed to know! Silly girl. She also wanted to know if I had a special party dress for today, that girl is obsessed with dresses right now. If I try to make her wear shorts or pants she literally cries. Great.

So yeah, on this day 25 years ago at 4:44pm my mom had me via emergency c-section. I was her smallest baby at almost 8lbs. I led the way for another 4 babies after that! Lol!

I also share my birthday with Kobe Bryant, Rick Springfield and a guy name Jay I used to work with (I just found this out today thanks to Facebook!)

By the way, are you following me on Twitter yet (@alaythea) or Instagram (alaythea)? You should, I'm totally the bomb-diggity!

Overload.

1. & 2. - Heading out to run errands. Bug looks more put together then I do!

1. All of Gi's shoes she's outgrown, ready for the consignment sale.

2. All the clothes for the consignment sale

3. Work out time!

4. Gemima fell asleep on my arm, so sweet!

1. Deer took over my yard the other day - four adults and two fawns! Adorable.

2. I'm obsessed with Sphynx's or hairless cats. I'm going to own one some day.

3. I'm DYING to be a red head, next summer can't get here soon enough!

4. Comfort food = Ramen noodles.

1-3. - Taking a break from swimming at my hubby's company bar-b-que

1. Daddy's girl

2. Gianna's adorable owl back pack for school

3. Riding in Aunt Char-char's convertible!

4. Sharin' skittles

1. I'm obsessed with my new glasses!

2. Banana phone

3. Just chillin'

4. Fur babies

1. I made french toast for breakfast this morning. Yummy~

2. Early morning

3. Big bug

1. Monkey

2. "Cooking" for us

3. iPhoning

4. Guy Fieri in the morning....

1. Cute, freshly painted toenails

2. Going to lunch

3. His eyes match my walls - ORANGE!

1. Putting air in her bike tires

2. Bike ridin' at the park

3. Entertaining ourselves with weird people on Youtube

4. Lil Golfer - gotta love that outfit, she dressed herself!

Happy weekend, peeps!

Home alone.

It's Friday, people. For us it's the start of the weekend. The hubby left early this morning to go play golf with a buddy and Bug and I pretty much did nothing. Well, I say that but we got some stuff done. I did a short work out and we both got showers, I cleaned up after the cats and fed them, cleaned up the mess Gi and Gemima made in my craft room and cleaned Gianna's room. So I guess we did something, it just didn't feel like much! I did some reading, I'm working through the second book in the Dark Tower series by Stephen King. And I watched some TV....

Currently I'm sitting on my couch, watching TV, reading tweets and typing this while I'm all alone at the house. What?! Yeah, I'm totally enjoying it! I'm pretty much just being brainless and doing nothing. Ha! The hubs took Bug too the park to burn off some energy and spend some time with her but of course it started POURING down rain as soon as they left so they've hung out in town. Now I think they are getting pizza and ice cream or something for dinner....

But I'm just enjoying the quiet. And watching the dozen black birds that seem to think they own my yard. They are here in the morning and they are here through out the day. It's kinda weird. I've read to many books where blackbirds/crows/ravens are signs of impending doom or evil! Lol!

The past couple of days have been rough....good in some ways and bad in others. I have a lot on my mind right now. A lot weighing on me and I'm realizing how much it's effecting everything - my attitude, my eating......I tend to turn to food when I'm stressed or feeling out of control. It's not excuse, seriously, but it seems to be how I work. There are a lot of changes ahead, I don't know all the details of everything to come but I do know change is ahead and that puts me on edge. The not knowing.

I feel horrible saying this but I can't even say I'm looking forward to my birthday on Tuesday. I'll be old, well, older. It's a week day birthday so Beej will be at work all day.....I think I may be getting new work out shoes from my mom and she may be sending me some homemade peanut butter granola. And if you've never tried it, OMG.....you have so missed out. It is decadent! I'll have to get the recipe and post it for you. I was going to make it myself but it's always been my birthday breakfast since I can remember so I asked mom to make it so that it felt special. Silly, I know, but Mom has always made a big deal about our birthdays and making it special for us and I've always loved that......so we'll see.

No other big plans for the weekend, just hanging out and spending time with the fam. Sorry about my lack of pics lately, I just haven't been taking very many. Guess I need to up my game!

Better

If you missed my post earlier this morning you can go back and read it HERE. My day didn't start off well or as planned. But I'm happy to say it got much better. My sis ended up being able to pick me and Gi up after we dropped off the Jeep. We ran by a new consignment shop, I had some stuff I wanted to sell. They ended up only taking a few items and gave me practically nothing but that's ok since I was getting rid of it anyway. It did buy lunch so that was nice! Gi got to play at McD's for awhile while my sis and I chit chatted. We browsed a few more stores and I picked up another job application.

After that my sis dropped me off for Gi's preschool orientation. That went well and it's really starting to sink in that's she going to be gone 5 days a week from 7:30am to 2pm! They talked about lunch menus and their nap/rest time (which Gianna wasn't thrilled about when I told her but she said to pack her pajamas! Lol!). I had to fill out tons of paperwork and I still have to take her in for a physical which she will hate.

Oh and did I mention my new glasses finally came?!!! I'm thrilled with them, they are super cute, super nerdy and so much better then my old glasses. And that totally made my day even better!

And that's about it....our Jeep has new tires, expensive ones (*sigh8). Next week I have to go get my license renewed. It seems money goes way quicker then you make it. But such is life.

Blog Button

This is my lovely blog button, peeps. But I'll be totally honest here, I have NO idea how to put it on my side bar with a link and all that fancy stuff. So feel free to snag this and post a link to my blog with it cause that's about all I can figure out for now! Lol! Don't hold it against me!

I mean, seriously?

Today is not off to a good start. I got up early to get Bug and I ready because we had to be out the door by 8:15am so that we could take our Jeep in to get new tires and my mother in law could pick us up and then we'd go to her dr.'s appt. with her. But of course, that plan fell through which is fine except now it puts me in a bind trying to figure out what to do about the Jeep. It really needs tires and it needs to be done today because we can't do it tomorrow and Monday I get the joy of sitting down at the DMV for God knows how long to renew my license before it expires on my birthday. Tuesday is my birthday and I'd prefer not to have to deal with the tire guys on my b-day. So it has to be done today! In other words, I'm going to take it down there and sit until their done about 2 hours later. It's in down town although don't get excited, our downtown is not cool and there isn't much there! Right now it looks like it's about to pour down the rain and I'm hoping that passes before we have to spend two hours walking around. Not to mention I'd prefer not to be a drippy mess when I go in for Gianna's preschool orientation today. Luckily my sister is going to come take Gianna to McD's to play while I fill out what the lady deemed "ALOT" of paperwork. great. I'm sorta just ready for this day to be over and it's not even 9am!

I think my work out will have to wait until this afternoon too. It might brighten my day if my new glasses came today but I'm thinking they won't be here until tomorrow or maybe even Saturday. I suck at waiting. And my mom can't find those Nike's I wanted in my size or the right color so right now it doesn't look like I'll be getting those for my birthday either......*sigh*

Oh and have I mentioned that my daughter has a phobia of going #2? Um, yeah. It's a nightmare. I have to "force" her to sit on the potty and go and she screams and cries the entire time until she bursts blood vessels in her face and gets red "freckles". I mean she'll go days without going. And she's not constipated. I check everything to make sure and she really just holds it because she's scared to go. We've been dealing with this for over a year or more. I'm ready to just take her to the doctor and figure out what the crap is wrong with her. And yeah, I made her sit on the potty this morning where she's screamed and cried for about 20 minutes and never went. I guess I'm off to get an enema. Oh the joys of motherhood!

Maybe a good cry would make things better?

Vloggin' Vednesdays

(If the video's audio isn't matched with my mouth please forgive me! It recorded correctly on my computer so I'm not sure why it didn't upload correctly. If it is fine then disregard this!)

One through fifty.

(I stole this from HERE!)

1. What time did you get up this morning? 7:30am

2. How do you like your steak? Medium or medium rare

3. What was the last film you saw at the cinema: Uh, Harry Potter, I think!

4. What is your favourite TV show? Currently, Restaurant Impossible of Food

Network.

5. If you could live anywhere in the world where would it be? Downtown Franklin, TN

It's so quaint and sweet. I love it!

6. What did you have for breakfast? Bran flakes and 1% milk

7. What is your favorite food? Steak and potatoes!

8. Foods you dislike? Mayo, mushrooms and asparagus

9. Favorite place to eat? A tie between Outback and Carrabba's

10. Favorite dressing? Caesar

11. What kind of vehicle do you drive? We have a Jeep Wrangler and a old

Jeep 4x4 we use.

12. What are your favorite clothes? During the summer, shorts and a tank top

13. Where would you visit if you had the chance? England

14. Cup 1/2 empty or 1/2 full? Half full I guess.

15. Where would you want to retire? Paris

16. Favorite time of day? Morning

17. Where were you born? Springfield, MO

18. What is your favorite sport to watch? Alabama football

19. What is your favorite fragrance? Mary Kay's Red Tea & Fig body spray

20. What is your favorite face cream? Mary Kay

21. Favorite baby/kids products? Melissa & Doug toys

22. People watcher? Yes, love to people watch!

23. Are you a morning or night person? Morning for sure

24. Do you have any pets? Gandalf and Gemima (cats)

25. Any new and exciting news you'd like to share? Gianna is starting preschool soon and I'm hopefully going to get a job, outside the home, for the first time in like five years!

26. What did you want to be when you were little? A singer

27. What is your favorite memory? One of my favorite memories is the day my husband first got back in touch with me after several years apart - the text he sent me and how my heart absolutely stopped!

28. Are you a cat or dog person? cat person

29. Are you married? Yep!

30. Always wear your seat belt? Absolutely

31. Been in a car accident? Yes

32. Any pet peeves? When people are late

33. Favorite pizza toppings? Pepperoni and extra cheese

34. Favorite flower? Roses and lilies

35. Favorite ice cream? Bluebell Strawberries & Homemade Vanilla

36. Favorite fast food restaurant? McDonald's

37. How many times did you fail your driver's test? None!

38. From whom did you get your last email? Twitter and Casey Wiegand

39. Which store would you choose to max out your credit card? Old Navy

40. Do anything spontaneous lately? We really aren't spontaneous people.

41. Like your job? Sure!

42. Broccoli? Raw with ranch

43. What was your favorite vacation? Our beach trip with my aunt, uncle, their kids and my sis was pretty great!

44. Last person you went out to dinner with? My sister, Charity, I think.

45. What are you listening to right now? Chopped on TV

46. What is your favorite color? Black and red

47. How many tattoos do you have? Technically four but two of them are now "together" as one.

48. coffe drinker? Gag. nope.

49. Favorite band: Coldplay and MuteMath

50. Paint your nails? My toenails are always painted, occasionally my finger nails.